General Naughtiness, continued

It's been an unproductive few months... There's a lot of people out there who need a good scratching, and I'm unable to gain access to them. I've done the best I can.

I bit Meow Cow on her kiester, so now she has a big hairless spot on her rotundity. It healed up pretty well, unfortunately. Usually she runs away when I attack, but sometimes she gets the nerve to fight back. Try getting body-slammed by the feline version of Boss Hog. It really humbles a fellow.

The owner's hands remain a constant mess of scratches and cuts in various stages of healing. His boss asked him the other day if he's a cutter. Heck no, I am! Lucas Tukus! Don't take credit for my hard work!

I've mostly destroyed the box mattress on his bed, and am working diligently on the leather couch.

Sometimes I fear I'm slowing down already. The other night I cuddled with the owner. He thought that meant I was being all lovey-dovey and it was okay to pet me, but I quickly disavowed him of that idea with my razor-sharp claws! I was just cold.

People are so quick to assume Lucas Tukus is selling out!