Won't you take me to the Kitty Town

Lucas Tukas here. Been a few weeks, but I've been really busy. I don't much like to sit down or sit still, even for a few minutes.

My sister, Ms. Circuference (Comfy) Rotunda, doesn't seem to care for my antics too much. She was here a good two weeks before I came aboard, stepping in the very same day Goober stepped out. The owner seems to have a thing for fatties, because Comfy weighs in at 16 lbs, about twice what the veterinarian thinks she should. She's a good four years older than me, and a bit set in her ways. When she first saw me, first she said "HISS" then she said, "HREWWW," which is feline for $&#@^#^#&@! All those ear mites that plague her can't help her mood much either.

Here's some of the things I've been up to lately:

• Covered owner's hand with dozens of scratches and bite marks, such that he now appears to be an attempted wrist-slasher. Really wins them over at business meetings I hear.
• Went out in park, ran deep into forest. Owner's legs got covered in poison ivy during reconnaissance mission.
• Jumped ten feet off of a deck in chase of rabbit. Was unsuccessful. Owner came close to having his "illegal residents" discovered during reconnaissance mission.
• Harassed Ms. Comfy numerous times. Got my ass kicked and pride tarnished as a result.
• Tried unsuccessfully to walk on a leash. Didn't dig it.
• Got extremely good at chasing a toy mouse on a string.

So you can see, I've been busy. Too busy. Maybe someday I'll take a nap, but not while I'm still young!